Monday, May 11, 2009

old stuffed couch becomes stuff white people like

From the hysterical blog Stuff White People Like, based on the best-selling book by the same title, click here for the Full List of Stuff White People Like. If you are offended that's perfect: you fit category #101 which is......Being Offended.

Modern Furniture is #79 on the list. The associated post ends with:

In situations where you need to improve your connection with a white person, just mention how you hope to be successful enough to one day afford an original piece of furniture by (insert obscurely named architect). If they have heard of the designer they will nod in agreement, if they have not, they will also nod in agreement and make a note to look it up later.

In either case, your status will rise.

I'd love to be able to say that this white couch sits in my living room. But that would be a white lie. I'm not calling it an out-and-out lie because I really did have a white couch once. My first husband and I bought a small, plain, brown couch at the Salvation Army store in Reno. We were in college and it's what we could afford. The couch was well-made, clean, and cozy and we named it Pooh Couch because it's rough brown wool upholstery looked like Pooh Bear.

I decided it should be white with splashy-colored pillows and I enlisted my mother to help with the project of recovering it. She was fearless when it came to sewing, and I was her opposite so this meant that she was vital for my success.

The material I selected at the fabric store was a pure white, thick, super-suede material. With my mother's brilliant measurements of Pooh Couch -- I remember that the haughty clerk was impressed -- I purchased just the right amount of fabric. The total cost was off the charts for any sensible single item home decorating project. But the end result, even if considering our hours of labor as an expense, was a really trendy and less-spendy couch than could be found in a studio. It turned out beautifully and my mother and I had a marvelous time making it together over lots of laughs and lots of coffee.....which happens to be #1 on the Full List of Stuff White People Like.


Beth Niquette said...

How hilarious! I must not be white though--designer anything just doesn't cut it with me. (grin) However, I LOVE hearing about your creativity with the old couch--THAT is impressive! And the fact you had so much fun while you recovered it is wonderful!

Happy Mother's Day!

Ananda girl said...

lol! I have never been here before and find myself delighted.

Lydia said...

@Beth- After reading your comment I thought about what, if any, designer stuff I'd ever bought. It came down to clothes, all charged when I was in office work. It's important for me to admit that I "bought into" the myth to that degree. And boy did it ever take a long time to pay for the work clothes. I have since given most of it away!

@Ananda- Your comment made my early morning as I'm just checking back here. Thanks for the smile. :)

Hilary said...

Funny intro to what sounds like was a wonderful time spent on your sofa project.

Thanks for your comment and question on my raccoon post. I have no experience trying to keep a raccoon from climbing my trees except for a brief period of trying to deter them from helping themselves to the bird feeder.

I did Google when I read your predicament though, and found this page which might be helpful if you scroll down to figures 7 and the accompanying text. If you try this, make sure you trim low-hanging branches so that they can't gain access around the barrier that way. Also, first be sure that there isn't one nesting in any possible hollows.

They can be very destructive and I sure hope your tree can be saved. Good luck. :)

Anonymous said...

Bloody hell. One would think that putting the fabric on their own couch would be cheaper, but it's not. I guess it depends on where you get the fabric.

I'm not into home decor by any tidbit, but I work at a linens and furniture store. We've just started selling fabrics again, and each bolts is like $400 (the company is still debating whether they should be sold by yard or not).

Lydia said...

@Hilary- How very thoughtful of you to take the time to find an actual resource for me! I visited the page and think that the apparatus shown on Fig. 7 is definitely worth trying. Our Sequoias are big...three/four people could cuddle the tree and join hands...so the guard would have to be designed with that in mind. I hope my husband will consider taking on this project. The life of the trees is not negotiable: they were here first and we took out a second mortgage to buy the lot in order to save them from being destroyed by a developer! I have hope that we can all exist here together! Thanks so much.

@Clandestine Samurai- Absolutely, you are right about the type of fabric. I was basically just a kid and didn't know what in the heck I was doing! That's interesting where you work. It must be high end with prices like that! If not sold by the yard what would they demand - by the bolt?